Expression
by chuppa chupsz
Summary: What's with this strange letters that Itachi seems to be getting? Why can't he ignore them? And who's the strange girl? - Itasaku - M for reasons later shown - 1st CHAPTER!


**HEY HO!**

**What's up guys! It's been a while since I've uploaded a "real" story - I'm getting addicted to the oneshots ... - so I decided that the next one would have to be well ... with more chapters SO here I go. **

**YouknowIdontownanything...**

**Please enjoy!**

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**1**

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He twisted the letter in his fingers. This time he had finally had the mum to go and get the envelope that was hanging down from a bush. Dangling free – it had been tempting him all through the week, hanging there, untouched and white. Right opposite of his window, he could always see it when he was looking out of his window. Dang it … it was too tempting. So today, he had taken down the envelope. It had felt like something forbidden and he had looked right and left. When no one had been there he had just put it into his pocket and opened his car.

In school he wasn't concentrated. It was frustrating, how his thoughts would always return to the letter – now in his school bag. It was calling him to read it, but you couldn't read the letter of someone strange, now could you? And on top of all, not in classes!

He was relieved when it finally rang to the pause. Two hours of pause. He had plenty of time to read the letter … and maybe respond.

As he sat down in the library at his usual spot … the spot of the group he was in was more fitting.

The Akatsuki were a simple school gang … more or less. If you oversaw the fact that they were all 'geeks' and 'nerds' … and maybe a bit violent it was a simple school gang.

The young man sat down and put the letter out. It laughed at him. The black haired man sighed – he was being paranoid. He banged his head once against the table before resuming back in staring at the white envelope. There was nothing wrote on it; it was just plain white, with a hole in one corner and a white wool string where it had hung.

"Itachi!"

The man looked up to see the nearest thing he had to a friend walking towards him. Kisame; a rather big fellow, died blue hair, sharp teeth, black pants and a wide black shirt. Though his clothes were wide and big, they were just 'fitting'. The young man flopped down opposite of him.

"What's that?" Kisame pointed to the envelope.

"I found it today." Itachi replied courtly.

"Well … open it."

"Hn." But Itachi didn't move.

Sighing Kisame snatched the paper away and opened the envelope. Itachi wanted to protest but stopped in the motion as Kisame began to read.

_I know it ain't right to be jealous. I'm not believing in god or something like it … it's just that I know that I should be satisfied with having what I have. But I don't succeed – I just fucking fail every time I try. _

_There is no man that can satisfy my needs, no man who can see me like I am. Because I am not. I just change every minute, when I'm angry I stay the same, just to show that I CAN stay the same … sometimes. The trouble is only that I can't stay the same for long terms. It's just not natural at all. I mean, everything is always changing. So why shouldn't I change all the time too. People don't like it – that's why. They like things to stay the same, to stay artificial. I'm a problem for them. They don't want me, because they can't read me. So there is no man like me, I scare them away._

_So … I am jealous of those who have a man, who have an artificial body. And I'm so stupid because of it. Only because they have someone who loves them in some kind … am I really that pathetic?_

_I ask myself if love is artificial as well. I liked to think that love was the most natural think that had ever existed. Now I fear that … somehow love is an artificial thing. Something completely … unnatural – at least in the way that we know._

_You know all the kissy faces and stupid valentines. All the words, the caresses …_

_Maybe love is just a mind thing, nothing that can really be experienced._

_And yet, when I write things like that I ask myself, whether I'm not just plain stupid and jealous._

_But __hell__ … who can tell me a thing like this?_

Kisame looked, Itachi stared. Feelings had always been a bit … different to handle for him. He just felt them far too hard. He didn't want anyone to know of his problems. The thing was: he was able to put himself in the position of others and feel whatever they felt as if it was real, he only didn't really have own feelings. There wasn't much – which was the reason why he always kept a neutral face. But this …

"Whoever it was … the chick really needs to get laid." Kisame played it down.

"Give it to me." Itachi only stated and held out his hand.

His friend handed it to him and Itachi left the library. It was so clear to him, so damned clear. He flopped down on the roof and took out a sheet and his pen.

_**You're not stupid, just because you feel something natural. **_He began._**You are natural, all you have to do is stick to that. Things come from alone after a time, there's no need to push them.**_

_**Valentines and words ARE artificial. Everyone can buy them, read them, look at them. The real thing is a mind thing. It's an understanding, reading in the eyes of the other what is wanted.**_

_**A real woman is not someone with a flawless body or incredible notes. A real woman is one who is alright with her body, who loves every inch of it. A real woman is a witch. She knows how to keep herself safe, has her own rituals in some kind. A real woman is rare … mostly because all women want to have a guy and would do everything for that, resulting in most of the women hungering for only a man. But a real woman knows who's good for her and knows how to use her body and her brain for it. And women like that DO scare men away, they are proud of themselves and that is unusual for women … and men fear it.**_

_**Changing is a good thing. Even if it is every day, every hour, every minute. It makes you open to other things, because you always entertain other thoughts.**_

He stopped there and looked at his letter. He was satisfied with it. Packing it away he listened to the bell as it rung to his lesson: Photography.

He liked photography, not only did he have it with most of the gang – save for Kisame, Kakuzu and Tobi – but it was also interesting to see some things through another perspective. In the class Mr. Hatake started talking about some things … boring things, like always. The class of fifty students almost fell asleep, until he announced the subject of today.

"I will put you into teams of ten … since we are so many, and I want you to take group photos … and you know what I expect…"

"A foreign perspective." The class repeated his favorite phrase.

"Very well. I will announce the groups."

He went on to divide the class into groups until only the Akatsuki was left over … and one girl. She had a black cap on her head, covering her hair, black baggies, a red tube-top over a black long-shirt and black etnies. She was wearing black rimmed glasses and played with a pencil.

"Oh great…" Hatake scratched the back of his head. "Konan … you know the sign language, right?"

Konan sighed annoyed and nodded.

"Fine. Haruno you're with them."

The girl sighed but nodded as well, before she stood up and picked her camera. She stood and waited for the rest to stand up, but when they didn't move she just shrugged and went out of the room.

"At least she flew off easily." Pein groaned and they went off.

In the schoolyard they found their usual place and started their work. They didn't notice the girl hanging down from the roof, the zoom on maximum as she snapped them laughing along, fighting half earnest. She chuckled along with them, when Deidara was lifted up by his foot by Zetsu. When they went back to the school building she followed them with the objective and caught them as they were all staring at the sun. She smiled to herself before she opened the door to the roof and swished back to the room, where it was no up to them to develop the pictures.

The Akatsuki stood together in silence, just like the girl they had been assigned to. She was busy developing pictures and smiled to herself now and then. But none of them could see her pictures, since she hung them up with the blank sides to them. She chuckled now and then when she looked at the developed pictures and Konan was really getting interested in them, but didn't ask.

Hatake went 'out for some minutes' and they 'should behave while he was away'. The students all agreed smiling brightly before he vanished out of the door. For some minutes it was silent, before the students started talking.

"Do you know Sakura?" one student asked loudly.

"I do. I heard she's a freak." Another one answered as loud as the first had asked.

Sakura's hands fisted, but she kept her smile – Itachi watched her. She was incredible interesting, she was feeling so much. He tilted his head in interest, as she resumed back to working out on her pictures.

"Yeah. With those hair she has to hide. And then she never talks. She really is strange. She doesn't fit into this school at all. She should attend a school for handicapped children."

"You're right. To join all the freaks and handicaps. They're all stupid … did you know that her brother was a trysomy-21 case?"

"God. What a tragedy. I hope he died. Children like that are so horrible. They don't belong in our society. They only eat from our money."

Itachi watched through the red light as he saw something glistening on her cheek. She was crying, he remarked. But she was still smiling and working on her picture – as if she didn't hear the things.

"You're right. And she will never be able to do anything anyways. I ask myself why she just doesn't take her life. She's useless."

"Yeah, and stupid. Did you know that the teachers let her pass because they pity her?"

"What a pathetic creature."

The girl opposite of him was still smiling and he found himself admiring her. She was smiling though she was crying. She was strong willed. The rest of the Akatsuki had found why he wasn't working anymore and watched the girl as well. When she was finished working she sat down on her chair that broke down immediately.

"Handicaps shouldn't be pampered like that – they will only think that it is the right way." They heard a voice once again.

Sakura stood up immediately and blinked a few times, before she only sighed and set her clock. While she was waiting she put away her things and cleared her working place, before she sat on it. Konan smirked – clever girl.

When Hatake came back he noticed how eerie silent it was. Sakura's chair was once more ruined – they always did it. He sighed and shook his head as he looked at the softly smiling, female student who was now sitting on her working place and played with the egg clock in her hands – waiting for her pictures to finish. Finally it rang – along with the egg clock of the Akatsuki.

Smiling Sakura hopped down and clipped down the first pictures, carefully touching them and packing them into a yellow envelope which she would hand to her teacher later on. She finished taking down her pictures and took her material bag with her, as she left the room, to observe her work in the real light to give him the best ones.

Akatsuki followed the girl to the rows, before she just went left, while they went right to sit down. She opened the envelope and carefully took the pictures out, placing them in front of her to get some good views. She lay some of them aside and looked for the best ones. Akatsuki decided to take all the pictures, since they were too lazy to sort them out. Itachi watched the Haruno girl as she worked smiling on her pictures.

Finally satisfied she put the best pictures into the envelope again before she brought it to Hatake. The silver haired man smiled and nodded. She sat back down on her seat and looked quickly through the other pictures she had developed before she put them into her bag.

When the bell rang Itachi didn't see her anymore – he would have liked to ask what she had taken the pictures of, since they had pushed her away. But right now … he had to get a wine red envelope and black wool.

In the evening he put his letter into the envelope and went down to the bush to hang it on the same branch where he had found the first letter. Only the lamp was his witness.

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**YABADABBADOOOOO! So what do you think? I think you really want to push the greeeeeeeeeeen button =D=D=D Do it, do it ... come one DO IT!**

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**Quote of the day: _There's a fine line between fishing and just standing on the shore like an idiot. _- Steven Wright**

**Peace and love, **

**~*chuppa-chupsz*~**


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